Whore

Last night I was going out with Kathy (the friend who I’m staying with), and her fiancé Will. It’d been a warm day, and I was in my cut-offs, a tank top, and sandals. Though by 7:30, it was cold & windy, so I had my arms wrapped around myself and was focusing on not shivering. As we were walking into the restaurant we passed by two women going in the opposite direction. One of them said to her friend, ‘that girl looks like a whore.’ As distracted as I’d been, it didn’t even register what they’d said until I got into the warm. And then the gears started turning.

Whore? Oh, the things that I could have come up with to respond to that.

‘Thank you!!’

‘You should see Master’s other girl.’

‘I look much better when I’m dressed to go out.’

‘At least I’ve got manners enough not to comment on a stranger’s appearance’ (both the women were a bit heavy).

‘I’m glad you noticed.’

‘It’s good to know that I still look that way.’

Of course, I didn’t say any of those things. Nor would I have done so at the time the comment was made. In spite of my self-doubt and soul-searching, wondering at what/who I really am, one thing I do know is that I’m still every bit as much of a kajira as I ever have been.

And I’d given them the most appropriate response a kajira in that situation could have; I disregarded the statement entirely (at least in their presence) and smiled at them.

In my opinion, there’s nothing wrong with being a slut or whore. To me, that simply means that a woman’s not afraid of her sexuality. She’s not one to hide it, but lets it show as simply another part of what she is. That’s not to say that she doesn’t respect herself or take care of herself. It's when she starts losing that respect for herself that cheapens her and being a slut or whore. And that's when she starts becoming what is now the stereotypical idea of being a slut or whore. Taking care of one’s self and respecting what you are is part of being a slut, part of being a kajira.

Shayla